Is it Reverting, Compromise, or Becoming Comfortable?

This week was the beginning of my new program and yesterday included 10 minute presentations on ourselves to the cohort. While there are only 12 of us, only 4 of us are local to Portland. The others have come from San Francisco, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Montana, Missouri, Utah, and New Mexico. All are social workers of course, and most seem "green" inclined. Their reasons for coming to Portland vary beyond school, but they seem to be representative of the influx of new people to Portland.

Somehow the fact that I am "local" makes me laugh. As much as I pride myself on being Oregonian, I have realized that although I've lived in Oregon for 16 years, I still hesitate to say I'm from the state. This is especially ironic when I believe my mentality is fairly representative of the state even with the urban/rural divide. So why is it that I hesitate to pinpoint my origin? Maybe it's because I feel I can't wrap my origin into just one segment of my life. Instead I like to think of myself as global citizen-even with how idealist that seems.

While the assignment of presenting myself was easy, it was also difficult to know just how much to share and how to make sense of myself for others. I always begin with the word "contradictive" as descriptive of my attributes, and I mainly blame this on the fact that I was raised in numerous locations and had a variety of experiences which forced me to see both sides of most stories. From the term contradictive, I tried to touch on the key points. Ten years of military and moving; faith based traditional family; the contrast from liberal Eugene to conservative small town; my year in Argentina; the stress of overloaded credits, multiple jobs, too many commitments in college with the benefit of a summer in London; my grandfather's death, my father's cancer, and my brother's divorce; multiple moves home, an attempt at a real job and then graduate school; and ending with Blood Diamond and the changes the simplicity movement invoked for me.

Which leads me to my thoughts of: as of late am I reverting to pre-simplicity/frugality/green living or am I compromising? For the most part many of my initial changes have remained the same. I still walk when possible, use organic products, recycle, reduce use and waste, donate, conserve when I can, and generally be as frugal as I can. But in the last several months I have also bought toxic make-up and gone shopping for new summer clothes. I've also reverted in some areas due to city living (such as using the clothes dryer). However, I suppose my question stems more from the concept that if one isn't moving forward in change, is one instead being stagnant? If I have reverted in some outward areas, am I truly being representative of the lifestyle? Or is it just that many of these actions have become so ingrained in me that it's hard to recognize them as "other" anymore?

When I want so badly to convince more people that change needs to occur, am I doing enough to demonstrate that it's possible? Am I truly living the lifestyle that I feel needs to be lived or instead am I conforming to what society expects? This balance is so hard to strike at times. How do you remain a part of and adhere to many of the ways of society when deep down you feel that society is mainly wrong? When is it compromising and when is it instead hypocrisy?

The shining light lately is seeing the changes that my parents have continued to make even without being forced into it by my presence in their home. Mom has become the recycling advocate among her family, coworkers, and friends. They continue to seperate out for recyling things they can recycle locally and things they must take to the valley to recycle. For the most part, she uses her tote bags and at least thinks about what is in the products they use. They purchased a Prius (and yes, I've heard the debate about how horrible the actual making of hybrids is for the world). Dad still bikes when he can. He mows with an electric mower. They have become the "greenies" in a fairly non-greeny land.

And maybe that's the trick of it. Just doing what you can when you can and being okay with it when you can't. And letting yourself be okay with the small steps back in comparison to the big steps forward already made.....

Returned

After five total days in a mini-van and a full week away, I'm glad to be back in my little apartment. Overall the trip went well and was well worth it. While Wyoming proved to be a bit monotonous (sorry Wyoming), the return route we took was much more beautiful and varied. The trip was a stroll down memory lane for my parents and grandmother and introduced all of us to many of the changes that have occurred in the various places they have lived and traveled. The time with my brother and his family in Colorado was wonderful, and I even felt bad at how much "green" harassment he faced via all of his Oregon relatives. Somehow Mom managed to get a bag recycled via a family friend and he just might be receiving a Brita filter in the mail. It's hard to believe that a state that appears to pride itself on its natural environment, does so little to protect it. However here are some photos of the road trip for your pleasure: The beginning of the mountains in Utah.

Honest Abe in Wyoming.

Windmills of today (see background) and yesterday in Wyoming.
Pearl Street in Boulder-the one place where recycling and a green lifestyle seemed prevalent (although with a hefty price tag). However it's my new favorite place in Colorado. Recycling, mountain air, live music....you get the picture.

The road in Utah.

The view in Utah. (Utah was gorgeous with its variations and beautiful colors.)

COLORADO!

A little bit of Rocky Mountain hiking yesterday. So beautiful.

A Trip to the Zoo!

Took a quick trip to the zoo today with a good friend and her daughter, which I had been wanting to do since coming back to Portland. A lot has been added in the 7 years since I was last there, including an entire exhibit on native species to Oregon. How wonderful that they are bringing awareness to so many of the wonderful animals and the issues facing them in our own area!

Black bear.

Salmon.

I also took a shot of a sign in the penguin area:

It says: "This we know. The earth does not belong to man, man belongs to the earth. Whatever befalls the earth befalls the sons of the earth...All things are connected." -Chief Seathl

While I always feel for the poor animals at the zoo, I consistently noticed things such as the sign above to raise awareness of the plight of many of these animals. I always recognize the educational benefit of having these animals at the zoo, but I still can't help but wish they would have had the opportunity to explore their native habitat. At the very least, their presence is helping to teach others about this great ecosystem of which we are a part.

Off to Colorado.....Enjoy the coming week!

A Simple Update

The last few weeks I've been debating whether or not to keep the blog. At this point, I still haven't decided. I feel that it's become too personal and not as educational as I had intended. Although sometimes I recognize the best way to educate is via personal connections. However a lot of my personal thoughts, I like to keep, well, ....personal. So....until the decision is made, postings may be few and far between. However there are a few things that have happened, so I thought I'd post a little update in this posting and then do a second posting of a rant and a couple reviews.

-The term wrapped up. There's an interview for my practicum next week, and I may have a connection to a part time summer job. There might be a TA position opening and two scholarships arrived. Thus I'm still praying that these other areas will pan out and believing that everything is going to fall into place.

-I fell in love...and he's not even a month old yet. The wife of one of my best buddies from high school had their child last week. He was a month early, but except for being tiny, appears to be healthy. I felt immensely blessed to be there the night of his birth and while holding him for hours the next day, I felt hope for future generations. Having kids is something I have mixed feelings about so it was nice to feel that I do have hope for the future generations that are being brought into this world after all.

-My tomato plant was not going to survive in my apartment so it got moved to another residence. And something (maybe a squirrel) ate the leaves off of one of my boxes of green beans. It's been moved and replanted. I'm looking forward to helping to weed my aunt's garden and the things we planted out there have all sprouted.

-I was given the opportunity to help shear alpacas two weeks ago, and it was so interesting! Alpaca wool is so soft and the animals were peaceful and calm for the most part. 15 total alpacas were sheared, 3-4 of which were pregnant. If I get pictures of the experience I will post them. And as cute as they were, I'd still prefer sheep.

-Two weeks ago I also had the opportunity to hear Sandra Steingraber, the environmental ecologist speak about the decreasing age of female puberty. She discussed several of the environmental components of this public health issue, but also focused on a systems perspective, in that this issue (like the majority of other issues facing humanity) can't be pigeon-holed as one of a single cause and effect. When the entire system is broken, then multiple elements within the system are the cause of all the broken effects. My question is whether or not we can all come together to fix an entire system of broken elements, especially when we can't seem to come to agreement on just one broken segment of a system.

-This week my parents, my brother and his wife, my granny, and myself are driving to Colorado to visit my other brother, his new wife, and their children. It's shaping up to be a good trip including a reception, a baseball game, and a trip to the mountains. However, 4 total days in a vehicle with five other people can sometimes be a lot and my brother who we are visiting (and who I love dearly) doesn't believe in recycling and most other things "green." I'm wondering if a copy of "The 11th Hour" would be too unwelcome of a wedding gift. ;-) I'm hoping I can keep a pleasant face when I watch mounds of things that can be recycled make it into the trash can.

Reviews and a Rant

-Speaking of "The 11th Hour," I watched it last week. It was decently done, but it didn't move me the same way as some of the other films. Half way through I felt that there is no way humanity can reverse the destruction we have brought upon it, and even with the second half's emphasis on the ability of new technologies that mimic nature, I still am unsure that humanity can survive. I did like the emphasis in that this problem is due to the current economic structure and is a problem of the way that a lot of people on this planet think. That we have begun to think we "deserve" this lifestyle and that nothing else beyond people have inherent value. And yet, we don't like to be called selfish....

-I'm also in the midst of the book "Better Off" by Eric Brende, who was a MIT grad student who spent 18 months living with and learning the ways of a Amish-like community. He found that less technology and more dependency on oneself and basic ways of living increased leisure time and actually made "work" a more pleasant and leisurely experience. Going back to basics in fact evaporated the need for the rat race to even exist. Once again, not needing "more" than necessary allowed for a fullness and relaxation not present when human selfishness invades.

-And the rant: AT&T has one unhappy customer on its hands. You've all heard my complaints about my cellphones. After having a replacement phone of the same model sent to me a month ago, I was told if this new phone experienced issues I would be given a new model of a phone. When this phone did the exact same thing (shutting completely off in the middle of a call) two weeks ago, I called AT&T asking for my new model. They responded that they have to send me yet the same model one more time and I have to experience problems in order to have a NEW model (and at this point I only have 3 months left on my warranty). SO THREE of the same phone-what a waste to time and nature. The poor customer service person was not happy to hear my environmental rant, but this is a major waste of resources! This also happens to be the THIRD phone I have had issues with via AT&T (which others with the same models have had similar issues thus I know it's not just my use of the phone). Thus, if AT&T is not willing to stand by the environment, its customers, and provide/mandate products with lasting lives then I no longer feel the need to be their customer. And yes, their headquarters is going to hear from me. I'm almost ready to go back to a land line...less waste...and with the increasing rates of brain cancer...I'm getting slightly paranoid.

And that's it! Well not entirely, but it's enough Simply Authentic comments for now. Hope everyone who is still reading this is entirely blessed and enjoying the bouts of good weather that we've been having! Have a beautiful week!