Decisions, Decisions.....

It's like these mass updates keep occurring :) but don't worry, I promise there are some fun things also.

I guess major announcement #1 is that Tall D and housemate G are still living in the house so far, albeit they're paying rent on their apartment also. The main reason behind this is that Tall D and I have been trying to figure out where we currently stand, because last week a prior decision was reversed for the time being, honest communication ensued, and hopes for a future (either together or apart) were shared. There have been major conversations since then and lots of time spent shared together---but we're still no where closer to a decision on which of three main paths to walk down. There's still much to work through..... and if I'm being authentic...then honestly I feel like I'm avoiding listening to my heart AND to my head. Avoidance isn't usually my subscription to life, but no one wants to be the one to make a final decision.

All this ties into announcement #2 which is that plans for the summer are on a stand-by. I've been looking forward to a summer of simple pleasures--river floats, hiking, gardening & yard work, travels, happy hours, etc, interspersed with my summer work schedule. While I recognize that all these things are still viable options, I'm not sure how readily they'll still pan out the way I'd envisioned. (Envisioning!!) Additionally Tall D's and my indecision places Z and Tall D's new apartment mates G and J in limbo as well.....

Ha--now add onto all this the end of the term that both Tall D and I are working through. Tall D's trying to bring his grades back toward his 4.0 status and I'm trying to finalize my students grades and prep for summer term. It's looking like I'll maintain in my other position until a new hire can be brought on, which extends my original contract into mid July. Great for the paycheck and my extra responsibility of bills (cell phone plans have already been broken up, half the utilities transferred to my name only, and did you know that car insurance goes up when you're separated?!), but I'm really just ready for some sort of a break this summer. But then again who isn't?!

And all of this leads directly into announcement #3: I've been asked by my supervisor to apply for a fairly big position within my campus...and per the usual I have mixed feelings about applying for it. I honestly don't even know that I could land the job because it's several steps above where I am now, but the recommendation from my supervisor would go far and the other campus administrators have all been impressed with the work I've done in my position this year. I meet many of the qualifications of the position, but I can also guarantee that they'd hope to get someone with more experience than what I have...and it's another position where I feel the fact that I'm only going to be 30 would be unnerving for some. I know I have the ability to do the job but it's also full-time, potentially high-stress, and I would have to give up most of my teaching.

Thus, in life currently, there are many DECISIONS, DECISIONS.

Now I promised some awesomes and I won't fail to deliver....although if you know me on Facebook, you've already seen many of these:

1) This lil' critter I found alive (albeit traumatized) hidden in my closet this week. Looks like Major lost one, but thankfully the bird was rescued and released (mainly) no worse for the wear.

2) I'd been pining for this awesome elephant mug from Starbucks for the last week or two. After sharing that bit of intel with Tall D, he hunted one down and had it in the cupboard to surprise me. Definitely has been making me happy as I sip my morning coffee.

3) My new passport arrived. The irony of life is that it arrived the same day that Tall D sat me down for our change-in-direction conversation. Whether or not it'll get used this summer as originally planned, I honestly can't believe how fast it came and it's still nice to have it available.

4) My buddies Z and B helped my aunt, uncle, cousin, and I rip out my aunt & uncle's old deck on Sunday. In one long day of fun work we got the whole thing removed, enjoyed lots of jokes, indulged in some great lemon drops, and ended the night with an impromptu dance party in their living room. FUN DAY! (Plus some of the wood from the deck is transporting to my place for chicken coop construction.)

5) Last Saturday I did my first organized running event: The Starlight Run which leads off the Starlight Parade. Tall D probably won't be very happy I'm including him in a picture on the blog, but I wanted to document so here we go. He, myself, and one of his college buddies ran the 5k together through downtown PDX. Costumes are encouraged, hence the ram's hat on his head. The run was a ton of fun and we even saw B and B's dog in the crowd! I've been getting a few other 5k runs in during the last week and with the help of Tall D's and my friend who is deployed, I plan to start training for a half. Woot woot---NEW GOALS! :)

So amidst chaos, enjoy the awesomes! How have y'all been?

A Productive Weekend Staycation

Whew what a weekend y'all, but although it was busy it was also relaxing and fulfilling. Much got crossed off the "need to do" list this weekend for sure! But before I get too far let me broach a few things first:

1) Last Saturdays event went pretty well. Lower turn-out than expected but everyone behaved, the food was decent, the decor and venue looked great, and everyone reported it was a good time. Even Tall D said it was much better than he ever would have expected and for someone who rarely gives compliment that should mean something! (His words, not mine.) The other plus side was that I was left with at least a dozen bouquets of flowers, which I got to bring home and re-vase for the house:

2) Tall D and a coworker of mine both also have made me think twice about leaving the world of veteran services. While I definitely need a break and the center really could use new blood to re-route it a bit more, I asked my supervisor of that position if I could extend until they actually bring someone else on. As much as I burn out, everyone tells me that I do a really good job. My original plan was to vacate as of June 20th and I still might, but extending also gives me the option to stay until the transition can be complete. Plus there are several projects that could get worked on this summer.

3) Tall D and Housemate G are supposed to be moving out this week. They spent the long weekend up at a major concert series in the Gorge and so Z spent part of the weekend here helping me around the house and making sure that we'll be able to live sanely together, as I'm not always the easiest person to live with. (Somehow, Tall D has actually been the best housemate I've ever had. We co-existed in living conditions extremely well.) With the boys moving out, Z will probably officially move in sometime mid-month.

4) Mid-week last week, I went grocery shopping....and it dawned on me that was the first time I'd been grocery shopping in six weeks. Tall D and G haven't been shopping either--how in the world we've existed over the last few weeks, I don't know. (Well okay, I take part of that back....Z brought over food for all of us on occasion.....) But hopefully this return foray into proper nutrition in the fridge is a good sign.

5) Albeit last week was also a bit harder emotionally again. As much as I know in my head that the upcoming split is the right one, some days as it approaches move out day it's a little bit harder for my head and heart to agree. And sometimes they want to agree....but in the opposite direction of it being the smartest decision....

And now without further ado....pictures and some updates from the weekend:

1) Dinner out on Thursday evening followed by an evening curled into blankets on the couch watching Blood Diamond.

2) Spring is upon us, which meant a 8-10 mile walk/hike with the dogs through Forest Park in the middle of the city on Friday afternoon. 

3) Friday dinner out with my brother, Z, and another Marine who you'll probably read a lot about by the letter of B. B will be spending a lot of time with Z and I here this summer...and has been tasked out to complete a few yard projects for me.

4) Saturday morning included a quick trip to the Beaverton Farmer's Market (the largest in the state) for tomatoes, onions, and a few other items for home cooked pasta sauce.

5) Saturday afternoon, I took my brother to meet with two tattoo artists to schedule his tattoo and to put down the deposit. Came back to clean the house, mow the lawn, and weed for an hour before my gal N, her hubby, her SIL S, and S's boyfriend came to join Z and I for dinner. Z's sauce rocked and N's cobbler was A-MA-ZING. It was great to have friends over for dinner, enjoy good food, and even to eat out on the patio!

6) On Sunday, Z and some of the center vets had organized to come over to help me out in the yard. Z and B were able to till my raised beds with a little help from B's wolf-hybrid dog, Rommel. I also spent part of the afternoon ripping out weeds and over-run berry brambles. I'd written previously that one of the guys had drawn up plans for a coop and Sunday was Day #1 for implementation. In this picture, three of them are digging the trench that will hold the gravel, cement footings, and cinder blocks so that hopefully no critters can dig under the chicken wire. B and Z are helping out my aunt and uncle by ripping out their deck for them next weekend, and some of that left over wood will be used to construct part of the chicken's actual shelter. After trench digging, Z grilled up brats and garden burgers for our work crew of 4 guys and 3 of us gals.

7) Monday was a day of errands and garden making. We returned the mini-tiller to my aunt and uncles. Then Z worked over the two chain saws in the garage while I finished my online grading. We headed out to Target (uh....CUTE dresses on sale y'all!), Home Depot, BiMart, and Ace Hardware. I picked up a pair of new work gloves because I'm not sure where my old ones ended up and I sliced the skin off a finger hauling cinder blocks on Saturday. We got a new chain for one of the saws and then Z bought materials to build a sort-of trellis for the beans/peas. When we got back, we planted the garden and then I finished weeding the front of the house. Laundry was done, the rest of my in-person grading and prepping was completed, and somehow even a work-out with Insanity was added in there last night (which felt GREAT!). 

Peas, beans, & various squashes that will run with the rhubarb in the corner.

First box: Tomatoes, the returning artichoke, a row of lettuce, two peppers.

Second box: a row of cucumbers, herbs, two rows of carrots, a row of koli rabi, and space for strawberries.

On trellis: grape making an effort and the kiwi is in full force.

Alongside the boxes: berries, rosemary, overrunning mint, and massive garlics. 

Honestly it was a great weekend and I'm so glad to have the garden in and the coop on its way. The yard has a great start to looking better as well. I worked on perfecting Tall D's blueberry waffles and for the first time made french toast from actual french bread and with my own chicken's eggs. The weekend was the perfect blend of socialization, productivity, and relaxation. However most of all, I feel so grateful to Z and to all the guys for how much they've been helping me out.....and in a lot of ways the future looks potentially brighter...

Hope each of you had a wonderful weekend too!

A Week in Review & a Friday Hike

We've had a week or so of absolutely gorgeous weather, although tomorrow is supposed to head back into a week of being overcast and rainy. Its been absolutely glorious to see so much sunshine though and the week has been full of moments of soaking up the rays interspersed with the extra chaos of our busiest event week out of the center. Earlier mornings this week and extra hours, but after tonight I'm headed into a downward slide toward exiting my job and the spring term.  There will be a week break in June before summer term (and the 11 credits I'm teaching) commences.

This week has brought some additional knowledge of the changes coming up (Tall D & housemate will be moving out by the end of the first weekend in June) and one evening this week was spent discussing with Tall D and his new apartment mates what they want/need to take from the house versus what will be staying, etc. There are a few items that are being negotiated, but the fact that "our" stuff has pretty much always been "his" or "hers" makes it easier. For the most part, Tall D and I are keeping it friendly but at times it can be a challenge. I still care so much for that man and wish that things weren't heading the way that they are, but there are also moments when I feel like it's definitely the healthier decision. Most days I just keep shaking my head that although it maybe was expected, two months ago I also never would have imagined this to currently be our lives.

Tonight is our biggest event happening this week and two of my main guys separately ended up needing to be checked out by medical providers. More than likely they won't be attending, but I'm hopeful that the rest of the crew can step it up and be on their best behavior. To say I'm a little leery of the upcoming evening is an understatement. Tall D and one of his friends will be there however and my cousin will be helping as well.

The chickens are back to laying regular eggs. My coop will be started on over Memorial Day weekend, as will some additional yard work be completed. Plus it's sounding like I will be taking bro to get his birthday tattoo. Last evening, we headed down to take my brother out to dinner and then to celebrate with cheesecake at my sisters. It was nice to spend an evening with my siblings and to rival against my nephew in Wii fit. :)

This week also granted a few moments to half-complete some Insanity work-outs and to get in one dehydrated 80 degree 5k run. I'm in conversation with one of Tall D's and my friends about him helping me train for a half-marathon during the coming year. We'll see how that idea progresses.

An afternoon laying out in the sun reading for fun and indulging in a bottle of wine and a great 7 mile hike in the forest just about rounded out the rest of the week. Pictures from the hike are below:

The dogs checking out the trail.

Beautiful tree tops.

Z checking out the creek.

Roxi looking like a dirty adorable mutt.

Me with the girls.

Pretty flowers and ferns.

The dogs checking out the spring.

Wildflowers along the road.

Split...and It Aint the Banana Kind

...although there is a container of Banana Split Tillamook ice cream in my freezer that continues to be steadily eaten away. But it's working toward official folks, Tall D (hub) and I will be no more. The conversation leading toward my knowledge of that decision occurred on Monday night and to say I didn't take the news very well is an understatement. I granted myself two full days off work in the middle of this week to grieve and despair. Ironically the timing couldn't have been much worse since we're smack dab in the midst of last minute event planning, it's mid terms, and Tall D's birthday was on Tuesday....however if there's one thing I'm continually learning, it's that life doesn't always go as planned....more on this in a second.

The one thing I have to say is that I am continually amazed and restored by the amount of love and support being bestowed upon me from near and far. Your blog comments bolstered me up and every day I've had numerous check-in texts from some of my dearest just to make sure I'm making it through that day okay. My good friends and some family have filled my time with happy hours, accompanying me on errands, and the occasional meal out. My brother (who also just recently divorced) even took a day off from work to hang out with a good friend and I--both of them wanting to ensure that I got out of bed. The friends of Tall D have offered me kind words and encouragement, and the guys who work in the center with me have all offered their own bits of kindness in their own ways. Both my supervisors found me coverage for my jobs--no questions asked. And even my landlord has offered her support when advised of the upcoming living arrangement changes. Even in the midst of my sadness, anger, and grief, I recognize that I am so incredibly blessed and fortunate. (And to be honest, I've been glad to see Tall D's friends also keep him company in their own way too......)

To say that my emotions are all over the place is also an understatement. Its sad to see such a big chapter of life close...and it honestly makes me feel a sense of failure toward myself, although I also feel that I did everything possible to try to make the situation, the marriage....better, stronger, truer, something. I never in a million years would have ever expected to add the descriptor of "divorced" in connection to myself. I'm sad and nervous to lose the routine and comfort of what has been my life, but I also daily am noticing the regrowth of my inner strength. Its frustrating not only to be realizing how long I let someone treat me less than expected, but also to be faced with the reality of what is to come throughout the ending of this process. I'm appreciating the honesty that has been arriving though. But regardless, I face the future with some apprehension and with a very guarded heart.

The catch of course also is....that I'm turning 30 (and beyond the dogs, cats, & chickens) am sort of back to a place that I never expected to be---and that is re-acquainting with my desires/goals and having the opportunity to just think about life being whatever I want it to be. No more worrying about how someone else wants life to be. No more worrying all the time about making someone else happy---I can truly think about what it is that makes me....satisfied by life and I have the freedom to again pursue that. And yes, I have to pay the bills, but I also now have the freedom to move should I desire, or take a new job, or even just to let the dogs cuddle on the bed with me if I want. And honestly I'm ready for it---for some time...to just get to know me again.

And of course there are some of the regular big changes ahead that come with divorce. The filing, the things splitting, the creation and transferring of accounts (although most of that has remained split anyway). Tall D and housemate friend will move out in June sometime and a friend of mine, we'll call him Z, will be moving in. Z's already planning on helping me make some of the changes in the yard I've been wanting and one of the guys in the center came over the other day to draw out designs for a chicken coop/run that he, Z, and another guy will put together for me. The coop will make it much easier to travel some this summer, in between when I'll be teaching. On one of my bummer days this last week, I also finally bought a bunch of starts and seeds, so now I just need to get them in the boxes.

I don't expect that the many changes will be blissful, but I do hope that the changes will bring renewal and restoration.....because that's really all I can hope for right now.

Much love to you and yours---here's hoping it's sunny and blessed wherever you are!

A Life Update: Bittersweet

How does one update a month that has been so full of decisions and upcoming changes? Well, I'm taking the easy way out....I'm gonna use bullets. ;)

--I spent the most amazing, restoring, and refreshing vacation I've had in years in San Antonio over a long weekend mid-month. I visited one of my favorite gals from one of my grad programs. We spent a day in Austin, which I've always wanted to see, and afternoons walking along almost every section of the river walk. We enjoyed evenings drinking wine, ate loads of great food, and spent numerous hours laughing and catching up on the past year. In all reality....I loved it so much that I didn't want to come home.

--Which also sort of led/finalized the biggest decision of the month/year, but one that has been a long time coming: Hub and I are separating. Now don't get me wrong, I love my husband more than words can ever express but there has been a lot missing for a long time...and I finally decided that it's time for me to try to be happy...even if that means having to be on my own again. I know it sounds so cliche to say that I want to be happy because I know that we aren't always happy in life....but for numerous reasons, I haven't exactly felt that I can ever make my husband happy....and that's been a hard pill to swallow for the 3/4 of our marriage that I've felt that way. I still truly believe in what we could have had together, but we both have to believe in and be willing to pursue that...and along the journey of us attempting to live somewhat cohesively together, I've also lost myself while trying to fit into what he needed from life....I became that woman that I always hear about and yet shake my head in disbelief.

--So what does this mean? Well, it means that I'm still going to care about him and I still love him. The ball is in his court as to what he wants this to be, if anything, in the long run....but he also knows that I expect to be cherished and truly loved in return. And he'll probably need to work through some stuff in order to do so. So for now, we live as wonderful housemates until this summer (we seriously do live incredibly well together), when he'll try to find a place on his own and decide if he just wants a break or for this to be the end. Regardless of the outcome and the marriage we've had, I truly believe in this man....and the future he might have.

--The secondary part of all this is that while of course I'm sad, I'm also relieved to finally be standing up on my own two feet again...and to have heard honesty come from him. I've already spent most of our marriage in disbelief and sadness, so in a sense I feel....a little more free.  Free to just be me, just as he's been doing, and to stop worrying about what I'm not doing right for him. In all honesty, my ring came off the day I finally made my decision and while I sometimes miss its place on my finger, it's nice to feel like it's okay to make decisions just for myself again...and to follow my heart wherever it takes me.

--All this being said, I'm slowly telling family and friends--many of whom haven't known that any issues existed. I have yet to tell Granny and I'm honestly dreading doing so.....

--In the midst of all this, coworker moved out. It was amazing to have him, but it's nice to have a bit more space in the house again. Back to hub, myself, plus hub's friend.

---However I have to say there have been some great moments lately:
-- We had a wonderful weekend of sunshine last weekend, which included a hike with hub, hub's friend, my brother, myself, and four dogs. We ended the day with a salmon & burgers BBQ at our house that included a good buddy of mine and another vet too. The evening wrapped up with games of washers and bean bags.

--Monday afternoon brought another hike with my good buddy and the dogs, and a major heart to heart conversation ending in some good decisions for him.  Singing country songs on the drive into the woods, an evening of pitchers of old school PBR, and grilled cheese off country roads left me feeling like its summertime....

--The trees are blooming, there are spring showers, and next week will be week five of the term. Teaching has truly been my reprieve and as interesting as my new classes have been, it's been a blessing to have those three hours two nights a week to just forget the rest of life and pour myself into my passion. I turned in my official resignation for my veteran's position and will no longer be in that position as of mid June. The irony is that as much as I need a break from that position (and in some ways it also led to me realizing much of what was missing in my marriage), I also will need to be looking for another part-time job to supplement my income if I am to return to being a single woman. I'm scheduled out for teaching through December and have some savings, but I'll still need an extra cushion come fall.

--Both my supervisors have proven to be amazingly supportive and empathetic....and while there is much event planning and details to get done in the next weeks, I've been encouraged to take personal time for myself as needed.

--The last two weeks have also brought out the amazing support of my friends, both new and old. I've been able to get together with many of my in-town gals already and I've constantly got texts coming in from others just letting me know they're available as needed. Ironically, the hardest ones for me to see right now are family, because as much as I know it shouldn't get to me.....any thought of divorce always makes me feel like I'm letting down the family name....

--Tera (our broody chicken) finally stopped brooding and has rejoined the rest of the world. It took a few days of tossing her out of the kennel and shutting it off, but she's back to her regular pecking activities. We continue to get about an egg a day. In cat news, the bell collar is not enough to stop Major---we've had two more birds (including a large robin) since hub snapped a collar back on him.

--Draw Something. It's my newest Iphone addiction thanks to my gal in San Antonio. She's playing it. I'm playing it. Hub's playing it. A few of my vets are playing it. You should play it too ;)

--And all things considered, the summer is looking good. I'm still planning on trying to road trip it with my girls to AZ for my 30th. My gal Heather and her hub just got "orders" to be stationed near Savannah, where my best friend and her hub are stationed---so I'm crossing my fingers that I can budget a trip out to see all of them still during my break in September. There's talk of a July trip to Hawaii for the wedding of one of the vets from the center....and there just might be another amazing dream trip for the end of August. Beyond potential hikes, river floats, fishing, gardening, playing with the dogs, beach trips, BBQs, and camping--the summer regulars.

In all gray clouds....we must look to the sun that could be just around the corner.

Spring Break Wrap-Up

Spring break was a truly wonderful break from both of my jobs. I did get roped into a few moments of event planning chaos mid-week and I had to finish prepping for next term, but I did less work overall than I've done since last summer....and it felt fabulous while also leaving me more than ready for June. The break also could not have arrived soon enough and the day before spring break was one of the most difficult I've had on the job. Thus I'm hopeful I can  bulk it up enough to power through the next 2.5 months.

This last week was equally full of chaos, downpours, and sadness intermingled with smiles, fun, and unexpected moments of sun. Sometimes all we need is a bit of a stay-cation including:

---Happy hour on four different occasions. Finally met up with a coworker I've been trying to get together with and it was loads of fun getting to know her better. Met up with a friend from my teaching program I hadn't seen in a year and it was lovely getting to catch up on the good & the bad while offering each other support. Had a great afternoon chat session over beers with my cousin. Got to catch-up & connect with one of my greatest supporters over dinner & drinks this last Friday.
---Major caught his 5th bird in a week & a half. Hub bought him a collar with a bell on it. The dogs like to chase said bell. Much amusement ensues.
---Several hours of long conversations and tears attempting to clear the air. Resolutions and suggestions made. Some slight actions being taken. Waiting game ensues.
---A friend provided me with her cast-off Insanity DVD work-out program. Read: 60 days of craziness. The fit test almost made me vomit---the rest is kicking my booty. We'll see if I can keep with this one but I am LOVING it.
---Interesting but fun long evening out with a great group of guys including hub, hub's friend, housemate, and one of my vet friends.
---Many long sleeps and a blissful evening nap.
---Hub installed a exhaust fan in our bathroom and replaced the one in the guest bathroom.....and was reminded that projects are never as simple as they appear. I enjoyed watching him wear Carharts, assisted in holding items in place and/or advising on lights, rode along to Home Depot and enjoyed drooling over plants, and scared the bejesus out of both of us by kicking his toolbox in the middle of the night.
---I went to church.....and the message was exactly what I needed to hear.
---We cooked, we cleaned, we paid bills.....and hub took Anna for a much needed beauty treatment. Hopefully our carpets will have less shedding on them and she looks ravishing!
---We finally had donations picked up by the gospel mission.
---We enjoyed the phenomenal day trip up north with hub's bud and were reminded of the need to do it again.
---Somehow (maybe a new persuasive friend, maybe too many martinis) I was talked into a potential double date of one of my worst fears: sky diving for hub and coworker's boyfriends birthdays in May.
---I had afternoon tea and conversation with our land lord.
---I followed suit of hub's cousin and re-cut bangs. Not sure how long they'll be staying but it's nice to have something different.
---Finally went in for a doctor's appointment to check on a few things that have been more off for the last month. No real results were discovered, but I guess it's better to hear the doctor say that things are more normal than they might feel!
---I played mad rounds of Words with Friends on the Iphone.
---My brother and mother came up for an afternoon where much support and conversation ensued....and ended with dinner at one of our favorite local haunts.
---There's a somewhat broody chicken out back. She'll leave the kennel long enough to range a bit here or there but then she's hunkered back down in her spot.
---There was an evening of DQ blizzards and movie rentals curled up on the couch.
---Plenty of text chats sharing life and seeking advice from many friends.
---Airport duty transporting coworker to and fro for his conference. Since housemate #2 was also gone this weekend, hub and I had the first weekend alone together in the house in over a month.

And somehow the week went by so fast and with a few things left undone, but here we are almost back to Monday and it all beginning again! Hope you all had a restful last week.

Life: Both a Cluster...and Yet Beautiful

Sometimes parts of life....are hard. Sometimes you realize yet again that things are missing. Sometimes you realize (again) that the promises you meant to keep....might not actually be kept. Sometimes areas of life seem painfully sad....and less than hopeful. And sometimes stubbornness continues to reign its head. Sometimes one needs to actually take the time to stop and think and listen and realize that what everyone else is saying....does have truth. And sometimes it's hard to think about potentially shutting a door, even when one knows that door has already been half shut. Sometimes one gets tired of thinking and talking and answering questions about the same old, same old, no change game. And sometimes you just need a break. And sometimes one needs to realize that asking someone to change who they are in their core is probably a no-win outcome. Sometimes you don't know which is worse.....being kept in a corner or being independently solo...again.

And yet sometimes, there's nothing as gratifying as a few moments of walking in a back yard. Of seeing green shoots and watching thick ladies sit on eggs. Of scratching, shedding dogs or snoozing, comfortable cats. Sometimes there's nothing as satisfying as a cup of tea in one's favorite flowered mug or the smell of work coffee wafting from a cup. Sometimes there's nothing like throwing one's self into work---finalizing projects and discussing pertinent issues with those who make academic decisions. Sometimes you recognize that the benefits you bring to those you work with, also want to be bestowed back upon you. And sometimes there's patience to be gleaned from waiting on PR phone calls from New York and working with community partners. Sometimes waiting for hours for maintenance issues to be completed is just the forced reprieve one needs. Sometimes the biggest smiles come from catching dogs snout deep in chicken feed or from multiple viewings of tickled penguins. Sometimes even though you realize it could potentially just be a lost cause, you relish every kiss, every touch, every look...as they're finally brought back into rotation. And sometimes you continue to wait with guarded heart and limited hope, because what you've hoped beyond hope for days and months and years seems to be considered unreasonable and unmet.

But in every gray cloud there continues to be elements of silver linings and who knows that better than those of us who live here in Oregon? And behind every winter always arrives spring..followed but the bounty and beauty of summer.

Another Weekend Away

Hiya folks and happier Monday!

As mentioned in my outfit post, I spent another weekend away. You might be thinking I'm running away from my full house but really I'm not....although I may have high-tailed it down the highway needing a mental health break from life---no lies. This time I headed directly for my other home---that town on the coast where my parents live, where I went to high school, where I met hub, and where there's just another vibe of life. I went thinking that I would feel so much more at ease and relaxed with time away, but in reality leaving here made me realize just how much I have here. I missed my dogs, my cats, my chickens, my bed....and I wanted nothing more than to be back where I could sit hub down for a long conversation. Originally I was going to come back today but instead I came back last night.

I took my time on the drive back---thinking about life, blaring the tunes, and appreciating the country. I took the back roads that hub isn't as keen to take and I breathed in remembering that views like the one below are what make Oregon forever feel like my home in my heart:

I might get tired of being home sometimes, but no other place has everything I could want.

My emotions have been all over the place the last two weeks--like perpetual PMS--it's been fabulous. Haha. I'm tired of work, tired of picking up the house, tired of not getting enough time with hub, tired of not being able to fix things for other people I love, tired of the gray days and ready for summer. An hour before I had to teach last Wednesday I also started feeling an UTI---needless to say I chugged an entire bottle of pure cranberry juice, five glasses of water, and then called class after two hours (an hour early) so I could come home to sleep it off. I stayed home Thursday morning and slept some more (and honestly I slept til 11am this morning). Since Thursday I haven't had any coffee, almost no alcohol, less sugar.....and what I've realized is that my body is exhausted and I'm probably more stressed by life in general than I've let myself realize. I also recognize however that there are many, many who have more to complain about than I---perspective is a good way to keep going.

Going home was good for many reasons. I spent time with Mom & Dad. One of my high school best friends fit me into her schedule for lunch on Saturday.....and our hour bitch fest again put my life in perspective and left us both looking forward to the road trip to come this August. I spent much time with hub's "fam"----visiting our newest "nephew" (hub's middle name sake), then attended the county beauty pageant to support our gal who was in it. On Sunday, I went to church with Mom and Dad---and just being there in the church of my youth and hearing the message, left me restored and remembering how much an important aspect of my life that needs to be. It's no wonder I get overwhelmed and whiny, when I start to lose perspective on what it's all about.

On the trip back I stopped briefly at my sister's and then headed over to my brother's to hang out for a bit. And then I arrived back to my house just as it was getting dark. Hub and I spent the rest of the evening wrapped up in conversation--not always the one we wanted to be having, but it was much, much needed and the resolution was closer to where we need to be. I so love that man but it's not always an easy road for either of us. A quick bite at 10pm, an episode of The Walking Dead snuggled on the couch together, and then some reading in bed before lights out---how time goes by so fast I'm always unsure!

This week is already looking like it'll be interesting. One of my vets is supposed to be coming to help put together a presentation, there's a staff meeting/event planning meeting on Friday, an urgent meeting got called for tomorrow morning, and then it's the final week of teaching and regular work week. Next week is finals, grades, and then I kid you not.....I will be sitting on my butt somewhere for the week of spring break---just two weeks to go and it can't get here soon enough!

As much as I'm tired and probably sounding full of complaints, I still recognize how good I have it. I have a solid husband who can melt my heart with a single look in the moments when he lets me see it. I have two rambunctious and loving dogs who bring so much joy to my life. I look out my back windows and see our chickens running around like crazies, laying their eggs in random places, but still being entertaining and productive. I have a warm, full home---one big enough to provide for others who need a place to be. I have great landlords. I have two jobs which allow me to educate and impact others, when all I really need is one. I have the freedom to choose whether or not I keep those jobs. I have parents and siblings who love me unconditionally and accept me for who I am. And when I grant the time I should to think about it, I have a Father who will continue to hold me in his palm--protecting, providing, and guiding. I have so much......that so easily gets overlooked in the minor concerns of the day.

More to say but this is already out of control---remind me to post about age---and feeling it :)

If you made it this far, I apologize for the internal word dump and I sincerely hope y'all had restoring weekends! But even more, I hope y'all have a great week ahead of you!

February Thoughts & Happenings

----The chickens are still making a racket multiple times per week. I'm thinking we'll be getting rid of them. The feed store owners (the mom of my gal N) said she'd re-home them if we want and offered new chicks, but I think I'm done til we have legit property one day. There's a good chance that hub would prefer to, um, eat them.

----We've offered hub's pride and joy old jeep to one of my vets who is in need of a vehicle. He's been hard pressed for months and as much as that Jeep is an extension of hub, these are the moments when I love hub's huge heart.....even when he tries to keep it hidden. However the jeep has its own quirky issues, is uninsured/unregistered/parked in the garage, so we'll see what happens.

----I don't know that this much TV has been on in our house non-stop and daily channel turning to MMA (mixed martial arts). We're still adjusting to four of us in the house but I'm oh so hopeful. My coworker has been looking at places and hopes to get a place in April. We have yet to discuss a timeline with hub's friend. My coworker is amazing though as a housemate. Luckily the guys and hub have been off enjoying themselves at the Newport Seafood & Wine Fest this weekend, so it's been nice for the doggies and I to roam the house freely.

-----My supervisor asked me to reconsider leaving my vet position, which I had a feeling she would. She also said I could re-create the job to better meet my and the center's needs. The pay is amazing and I actually found out that it bumps up my pay in my other job too.....but I'm still not sure I could do another year. There are pro's and con's to every thing---and honestly I keep hoping that something else might open for me to do a lateral transfer.

----Although I did "put the smack down" in the center last week, as mentioned in my clothing post. Ironically one thing I love about working with vets is a) some of them respect me more now because of it and b) they're so used to that sort of thing that most of them were back to being jolly and normal within two minutes......but for the most part, they DID get the picture and that's good to see.

----Book club was today. I was (sigh....) almost 30 minutes late....and yet this seems to be a return to hub's and my standard. We also were 15 minutes late to a joint vet mtg together yesterday....although in our defense, we were 10 minutes early to my work dinner! (Which work dinner went AWESOME btw!) Being late does make me feel bad...slightly. Only because I know that a lot of people that love me.....also despise being kept waiting. Anyway the gals also chose to go with Joy for Beginners---so we'll be reading that this month.

-----Today I was thinking of 3 high school gal pals and how much we've loved each other through different phases of ourselves. When I think back on all of our changes in 15 years.....it's amazing, and yet they've accepted me for me (almost) every step of the way. I love these girls because I can be any side of me and it's always okay. If I'm caring and idealist, withdrawn and needing space, or blunt and bitchy.....it doesn't matter. They accept who I am at each crossroads of life....and I am beginning again to realize just how much I appreciate it. I don't have to be anyone but me with them and I never have to worry about offending....and I seriously hope they feel the same way.

-----I have a weekend trip in April to San Antonio. I am beyond excited to see my gal....and in a total moment of irony, I'm seriously looking forward to being back in the south. Amazing culture/food in San Antonio AND 80 degree weather. Also on the docket: see my childhood friend again AND make it to Austin (definitely on the lifetime list)!

----I seriously love when Roxi comes running back into the house in the evenings and just careens into her cushy dog bed.

----I took a nap today and have been 100% lazy and it's been absolutely perfect.

----I found another awesome remix fashion blogger that y'all should check out: Putting Me Together.

----I'm still in my anti-social stage--I'm just not feeling it. I know I'm in a total selfish stage period---want my little moments with hub, want flexibility to spend lazy weekends grading and working out and running errands and flexible, and honestly I'm just not wanting to get too deep into thinking about life. I seriously love and missed my friends who care so deeply, but right now I'm just not there and it's hard for me to want to go there. I work with people who need a lot and who are hardened to the world in many ways....and well, I think it's rubbed off. My idealism is a whole lot more realism than I ever would have cared to have....and in a lot of ways I don't feel as much like talking about what could be or should be or thinking about how to make life better, etc ... it is what it is.

-----Hub aced both his bio exams this last week. He's such an academic rockstar---I'm legit proud of him.

-----The Air Force is supposedly recruiting for Public Health officers....I emailed the health professional recruiter for more info. Side bar: every 2-3 years I research and contemplate joining the Air Force or Coast Guard.... thus far it's never been the right fit. I still don't expect it to be the right fit, but it is interesting to say the least. However 5am and I have never been friends, and I'm also learning that while management might be an okay fit for me, I'm not sure it's my favorite.

-----We're headed into Week 8 of the term---although I'm headed to a conference in Salem on Thursday, so it's just two evenings of teaching this week. I'm thinking about trying to spend the night at Granny's and hopeful I can see one of my other gals who is pregnant and who I have only seen twice in the year we've been back.

-----On the docket this summer: two of my gal pals from high school and I are road tripping to our other gal in Arizona. We've been talking about a Summer 2012 trip for two years, and I re-arranged my teaching schedule within the timeline the other gals have available (K-12 schedule starts late August). One of the gals is in San Fran so picking her up is the perfect halfway mark, and it just happened to coincide with my 30th. (Three of us turn 30 this summer actually.) I'm seriously so stoked to be making this happen! And my parents deserve an award, because they're tentatively agreeing to swap the Sorento for their Prius---cha ching!

------On the docket in the next three years: potential opportunities for international travel, but I've been sworn to not mention any of it. Although I can tell you that one place would add a new dream continent, include potential mission work (my heart swoons), and get me that much closer to achieving my lifetime goal of traveling to all continents. The other trip would be a lifetime dream for a friend and would be an amazing celebration of her, of which I would feel honored to be a part. (And it's all of course dependent on what I do for work/finances in the next few years....and what all else life might decide to throw at us) Add on to this my heartfelt desire to buy hub a vacation, the fact that we currently have friends stationed in Italy, AND that in the next 9 years I legit need to return to Argentina. (Hmmm......when does hub start racking in the bucks?! :))

-----Have I mentioned my department head is amazing? He seriously recognized that I need a vacation this year and so allowed for me to plan my summer schedule to grant me most of September (to potentially visit my gals in Georgia) and to rearrange our original plan so my gals and I could make it to Arizona. He deserves boss-of-the-year award! And just in case you're wondering I'm teaching twice a week in person and two classes online.

----Tomorrow I need to run. Period.

-----But have I mentioned yet that at 10am today it was 39 degrees and slushing?!

-----And how totally bad a$$ is it that it's a Leap Year?!

And with my brain dumping successfully completed and you up-to-date (for the most part and only if you made it this far), I'm off to get teary some more about The Heart and the Fist....because damn it, I'm gonna read it first anyway! ;)

Busy, Busy Love Bee

Ten minutes to post---and I usually spend at least 45 fine tuning what I want to say so apologies to keep it short and sweet. Tonight the homestead gets plus one and on Saturday, we'll be up to a full house. Woo---changes!

Monday was a whirlwind of activity but just about everything on that to-do list got accomplished. Recycled the old lap top, old batteries, plastic bags, CDs, an old cell phone, random cords. Filled the car with gas. Dropped off the bag to Goodwill. Sold books to Powell's and donated the rest. Graded last week's assignments and half of this weeks. Made the return to Freddies and returned all the bottles. Met the coolest guy at the bottle return who was a real gem and incredibly nice. Bought groceries, including sweet little somethings for hub:

Can I win an awesome wife award for buying him Cinnabons and our Louisiana beer?! :)

 The dogs and I reminded ourselves how much we love the Sorento over the Civic and we bought the straw for the chickens:

And I was reminded of why farmers aren't fat--hauling that straw took all my muscles! But the chickens seem much happier.

Add in a 4.2 mile run and vacuuming the entire house, including the nasty furry baseboards. The shower got scrubbed and the final touches of picking up the house occurred. An hour spent chatting with hub and then lessons got prepped and emails responded........and then the day was done!

Tuesday and today are just as full---but it's been our final days of alone time in the house. Here's hoping these changes will be good :)

What a Productive Day!

Whew, for all my whining earlier in the afternoon yesterday, the last 36 hours saw much get accomplished. I knew it'd all get done, but I just didn't expect to feel so rejuvenated with the process. And as much as I know that only one glass of wine should be drank per day for maximum health benefits, I swear the three glasses I consumed throughout last evening just may have had something to do with it all.

You don't want to know that I was up until 2am this morning, but I'm telling you anyway and it actually allowed me to feel somewhat organized before calling it a night. I finished my Yoga X workout yesterday with much toxin releasing sweat and a few woozy moments, but the overall workout was what finally gave me the kick of energy I needed for the evening. Hub and I made our grocery store run mid-evening to stock up on the week's groceries and then fixed ourselves some sustenance to see us through an evening of studying and grading. Between late dinner and 2am, I made it through the rest of the online assignments (plus the ones that were already turned in for this week), spent 35 minutes responding to emails for my other job that had piled up over the weekend, and then quickly graded the assignments from my two in-person courses.

This morning I woke up feeling great, brewed myself a lovely cup of espresso with my newly found and purchased coconut creamer (which might be it's own blog post), and got started on the most amazingly productive day. Between 10am and leaving at 3pm for my late afternoon meeting, I graded a few late assignments, inputted grades, fixed and printed one of two exams for this week, looked over my lecture notes for tomorrow, emailed my class, and checked my work schedule for the rest of the week. Our entire bedding got washed and sheets & towels replaced, the spare room got picked up, the bathroom cleaned, the dishwasher emptied, the dogs loved on, the house vacuumed, the recycling taken out, and my 70 minute P90X work-out completed. Showered, dressed, snack grabbed, checked in with one of my vets, and out to my 2 hr meeting I went, where I also checked in with my boss and gave a five minute on-the-fly presentation. After the meeting, I chatted with my boss for another 45 minutes and copied my two exams for this week. On the way home, I gassed up the car and purchased stamps to mail our rent check to the landlords (who gave permission for the housemate btw). Once home, I gathered and took out the garbage for its pick-up tomorrow, did another load of laundry, folded the earlier loads, readied my bag and snacks for tomorrow, ground enough coffee to last the week, fed the dogs, took care of the chickens, loved on the cats, and made dinner. As I finished enjoying my dinner, hub came home from a late evening studying for his mid-terms and we chatted for a bit while he prepped his lunches & snacks for tomorrow.

And now somehow it's 10:30pm and we're ready to call it a day, but I'm so thankful for a Monday full of so much accomplishment. Definitely sets the tone for what will be a busier than normal (and desired) work week! Contemplating getting up at 5:30am to complete tomorrow's last work-out of Week 5, but I don't know I'm exactly that crazy yet. :)

Hope you all have had a happy and productive Monday! (And speaking of productive, how the heck did I manage so many posts in January?!)

A Rambling Update

Heya folks---those of you that quietly continue to read along :)

So I've got a major confession for today: I slept in til 7 minutes til noon. I can't believe I almost slept in til noon and honestly I could have slept for another three hours easily. My throat continues to scratch, my mind continues to attempt to list the things I need to remember to do this work week and the things I need to do for my personal life and the things I need to get accomplished this weekend for grading and prepping. We're out of orange juice and Emergenc-E, but luckily I found a package of zinc drops hidden in a cupboard last night. I'm feeling muscles I didn't even know existed in my upper chest this morning from last night's new DVD and I have 90 minutes of Yoga X to get through today, which I'm way too stubborn to miss at this point regardless of how tired I'm feeling. And truthfully I only woke up at noon because the dogs bounded into the room creating a ruckus and stirring me from a dream about my parents modernizing their living environment and in which my father was to undergo major surgery again---probably not the best dream to be woken up from without being able to process the outcome!

The best thing so far about today has been the large cup of coffee I enjoyed that pushed away my headache, the waffles hub made for our brunch this morning (a weekend regular around here now), and the fact that hub and I sat and chatted for a good hour and a half this "morning." I think I've hinted that there isn't much overlapping time during the week for us to really chat and connect, so I've really come to cherish the conversations we do get to have. Especially since this morning a decent portion of what we talked about was the fact that come March we more than likely will be joined in our house by hub's buddy as our roommate---and we're trying to discuss how to make this be a successful transition and living situation for all of us.

Today's one of those days were it's already 3pm and I'm 2/3 of the way through grading my online class and I've read through my work emails to know what I have to take care of tomorrow on my "day off." And honestly, thank God for a Monday more or less at home, so I can get all these extra pieces in line before jumping into the three full work days I usually have (although I do have a meeting tomorrow evening I have to attend and an extra evening meeting another day this week). Before bed today, I still must grade the assignments for my inperson classes, complete my P90X workout, prepare the rent check for the mail tomorrow and email my landlords about said potential housemate, and hopefully venture to the grocery store to stock-up on essentials to make it through this coming crazier work week.

Luckily yesterday was a slower day of book club in the morning followed by extra time at my cousin's house (she was hosting) catching up with her, my aunt, and my uncle. I came home exhausted and attempted to take a nap before getting the energy to make it through the evening work-out. Exercise routine and shower completed, hub brought home eggs and video rentals. We ate breakfast burritos (yea for extra protein) and watched two movies, while I graded the first 1/3 of the online assignments. Both movies were pretty decent so if you're looking for two flicks, check out: 50/50 and Crazy.Stupid.Love, the latter of which was actually suggested to me by one of my vets.

I'm not sure why it's always the third and fourth weeks of my terms that appear to be the busiest, but I'm pretty sure I'll be glad when either a) there's a lull in the term b) we can arrange a relaxing weekend trip home (there's always something about the coast and being back at my parents that even though I'm still grading/working, everything just feels smoother and easier) or c) the term is over. Although there's a lot of event planning to get set-up this term so I'm not so sure that I see option A actually arriving until the end of May.

But as much as I'm totally sounding like a massive whiner (sorry folks!) there have been some really great connections and moments that have happened in the last week as well, and I continue to feel that I'm going to get everything done. I'm incredibly grateful for the great support system I do have and for the easy enjoyment one gleans from furry creatures. Even our fabulously independent and prissy Lady cat has been ambling for some extra love and cuddles lately!

Hub helped out a ton yesterday while I was gone and picked up the yard and cleaned out the chickens mock-coop---two tasks that usually fall to me on the weekends so I was thrilled he went the extra mile. I had a nice chat with one of my brothers to start the weekend and it was great to spend some quality time with two of the book club gals yesterday morning (one of whom I hadn't really seen or talked to since November and who is legitimately one of my favorite people). There are plans being discussed for me to budget to visit two my other favorites who both are living in Georgia and the idea of a long weekend trip to visit my gal who is in San Antonio---a break away, being back in the sunny south, and quality time with some of my favorite gals sounds amazing right now!

Having an extra person in our household, while potentially an extra stressor, does also add extra monthly income and someone who can keep an eye on things if hub and I need to leave town for a weekend. (Did I mention he loves our dogs?!) And let me tell you folks, for being rainy Oregon, we had two beautifully sunny days lately! Add on to all that the little regular fun moments of the days (1940s big band music playing in the kitchen, crazy critters' antics, inside jokes between hub and I, and the list could go on) and really life is pretty enjoyable overall!

If you've made it through this mindboggling ramble, then you sort of know where I'm at---feeling a lil' run down and extra tired BUT trucking on through and thankful for the positives that exist along the way. Oh yea, one more addition, Granny (while she's okay) has been having some unusual health issues lately, so for those of you that are regulars, just keep her in your thoughts.

Sending lots of love, extra energy, and positive encouragement out your way! Here's to the fullness of the week ahead of all of us.

Moments of a Friday Morn

You know those moments when mindfulness falls upon you and you hold those snapshots of vision close to your heart all day? Hub and I had a lot of those moments that we pointed out to each other the weekend after we got married in order to hold us through some of the separate moments we'd spend in the months after. Sometimes though, mindfulness is less of a daily ingrained habit and something we stumble upon only in passing. This morning, I'm not sure if it's the groggriness of the cold I'm attempting to halt or just the relief of the end of the work week (for the most part), but I definitely recognized some of those snapshot moments this morning.....

Hub might kill me (not really) but here are some of those moments of the morning:
---The gentle chilly morning air hanging low and appearing like a protective coat around the community.
---Hearing the smack smack smack of Major swatting my chapstick off the dresser this morning and turning to see him sitting as regal as a king (at least a king in his mind!).
---Hub coming in to check on me still snoozing this morning, wrapped only in his towel after his shower---whit whew!
---Roxi licking my hand happily as I ventured out of bed and propping her paws up to "assist."
---The dogs excitedly following hub around the house hoping to tag along to campus.
---Major darting and rolling around the house all morning like he was a forgotten member of the mission impossible team.
---Gratitude for counters that have been wiped down, hot coffee, and delicious toast.
---And hub all bundled up for his first attempt to ride his bike to catch the MAX to campus, turning on his way out of the drive way with a wave and "toodles!" ;) Haha.

I've got fifteen minutes to throw on my outfit of the day and head out to a different campus to attend the afternoon session of the teaching conference being put on by my college. This evening I'll do my P90X session and hopefully make it another 100 pages in the book club book (which is to be discussed tomorrow morning--ironically I think I'm enjoying it the most out of everyone!). Tomorrow after book club, hub and I are maybe going to hit up BodyWorlds but the couple on the corner that we've enjoyed are throwing a birthday party for their lil girl so we'll have juggle what all we can attend. More assignments to grade online and from my in-person classes and prep-work are scheduled for Sunday, and a longer than normal work week coming up this next week too---woosh!

The extra busy of this last week (juggling meetings, micromananging employees, coordinating a donation drive on campus to raise money for a local non-profit providing services to homeless and low-income veterans, marketing at club fair each day, responding to the usual veteran needs and issues, weeding through 50-100 work emails each day, letting my boss know I'm not re-applying for this position next year, teaching conference attendance yesterday and this afternoon, and still teaching/prepping/grading my courses and responding to their emails) with the added extra busy of next week makes me glad for a morning of mindfulness and rejuvenation.

Hope you have your own moments of mindfulness to take with you through some of those extra busy moments of life! Sending postive thoughts, energy, and prayers your way!

A Day in the Life: Weekday

I'd intended to write this post last night and then I got caught up in a variety of different things when I'd mentally scheduled to do it.....and then it was midnight and definitely time to get to bed!

So what does a day in the life of a weekday look like around here? Very different for hub and I for sure. Both of us have a long day once a week although they don't fall on the same day and our coming/going times seem to be staggered most days, which actually works out better for our furry ladies anyway.

But anyway my average weekday schedule usually looks a lil something like this:

6:30am Wake up to the dogs or hub or just because....but tell myself I can just get 30 more minutes of sleep if I only close my eyes.
7:00am Alarm goes off. At least one day a week I get up.....otherwise at least one day a week I hit snooze.
By 7:15am, spend next hour: turning coffee on, checking on dogs or leting them out/feeding them, feeding the cats & chickens most days. Washing face, putting make-up on, making something for breakfast, and getting coffee in Klean Kanteen. Washing dishes used and getting anything I need for lunch. Loving on dogs and choosing something to wear.....and getting out the door.

Get to the office, start coffee, open up.Spend work day responding to veteran questions and concerns, reading emails, scheduling meetings, paperwork, event planning, club coordination, employee management, etc. Being in meetings at least one day a week if not more.

Depending on the day, either head home in the afternoon for a break and to gather papers for teaching evening class, making lunch, playing with dogs before heading out to teach for 3 hours OR go straight from first job to look over lecture notes at faculty space and then teach for two hours.

Evening, head home. Grab mail if hub hasn't gotten to it yet. Love on dogs and pick up around house a bit. Change into work out clothes and do 50-90 minutes of P90X routine. Cool down and prep coffee for the next day. Get in the shower and get 90% ready for bed. Make something to eat, check and respond to any emails, chat with hub. And by now it's either 9pm or 11pm.....and I space out for about 30 mins to an hour on Pinterest, FB, or prep for the next day's lecture and class.

By 10:30pm-12am, crawl into bed...and usually toss and turn for 30-40 minutes at least.....and then start it all over again.

A Day in the Life: Saturday

Of which Saturday really isn't all that much different than Friday, Sunday, and part of Monday around here. We were tempted to head south to our home town this weekend to visit with hub's "sis" and her new baby, but the highways are closed due to floods, sink holes, and slides----didn't I tell you that Oregon had some crazy weather this last week?

Yesterday started out lazy also, and concluded with my P90X workout, happy hour with hub's buddy, and getting my online grading done for the most part. We also watched a hilarious movie last night (Larry Crowne), which I think provided more insight for hub into what life is like for a community college instructor. ;)

But anyway, today which is Saturday:

4:30am I told Anna to lay back down, she'd been up flopping around half the night.
6:30am Both dogs are up. I let them out yesterday so I wait to see if hub will be the one to put them out. He does.
9:45am I grab my phone to check the time and proceed to check email, FB, and Pinterest. I also start texting with one of my gals in Louisiana, yet continue to lay in bed. (For all you parents out there, don't hate us......)
10:30am I get out of bed, let the dogs in, start my espresso, and start preparing french toast.
10:40am Hub gets up. The dogs greet him excitedly. He gets the paper and hands me my section (Home & Garden), and starts reading while also checking sports scores.
10: 50am We both eat the french toast and I save a piece for the dogs.

11-11:30am We look at the paper, mail, and chit chat about random things, including the other strange movie hub watched last night.
11:30am I clean up from breakfast and give the dogs their share.
11:45am I get ready for the day (clothes, make-up, etc). Hub takes out the recycling.

12:30 I head out to run errands and load the dogs up to come along.
12:40 First stop Albertson's to drop movies back at Red Box.
12:45 Think about stopping at gas station to put more air in tires.....but it's raining.
1:15pm Arrive at Bishops for hair trim. Wait for 25 minutes for the gal I usually have but turns out she's not there. Decide to let different girl cut it--turns out okay (but still wish original gal would have been there.....discover her name).
1:50pm Pay & tip stylist. Head back toward home.
2:15 Stop at gas station to add air to tires. (Low pressure light had been on for a week but hub checked them midweek.) It starts sprinkling. I discover there's an art to adding air to tires and I am in need of practice. Notice I am being oggled by men as I am airing tires.....in the rain. Finally get tires mostly situated and head home.
2:30 Arrive back home and unload dogs. Hub starts vacuuming. I check on chickens and open their abode to try to get them to come outside. Hub provides almost-empty peanut butter jar to dogs. Commence humorous evening of dogs attempting to lick all peanut butter out.

2:45 I leave for Feed Store to purchase a hanging pecking feeder to distract chickens while they're cooped up.
2:55 Arrive at feed store. Secure pecking goodie. Oogle bunnies, chicken hutches, and new leashes/collars for dog. For go "only buy used month" and select two new leashes and a new collar for Roxi so both vehicles now have leashes.
3:30 Arrive back home. Show leashes to hub and put new collar on Roxi. Hang distraction pecker in make-shift coop. Enjoy watching hub "call" to chickens to coax them out into yard (we're trying to get them to do this on their own rather than us drag them).

3:45 While back inside we hear commotion---chicken has vacated the coop! ;) Spend next ten minutes watching them not know what to do with themselves and eventually hop back inside shed & coop.
4pm Hub leaves for evening out with his friend. I change and do P90X Yoga X work-out.
5:30pm I actually concoct meal from random things in house (somewhat inspired by pinterest) and place in oven. Wash dishes.
6pm Hop in shower.
6:15pm Vacate bathroom. Remove meal from oven. Get dressed again and re-apply "face."
6:30pm Load dogs in Sorento. Go to Albertson's for a bottle of wine, bananas, and face stuff.
7:10pm Head back home and unload. Make smoothie and eat dinner (both are okay but not fabulous).

7:40pm My cousin arrives for conversation over beers & wine. Turns into a great time together.
10:30pm Cousin heads out for her house. I mend two garments. Watch an episode of Dear Genevieve.  And make (pinterest inspired) No Bake Energy Balls (with vanilla chips, chopped walnuts, and cranberries added)....they are delish!!

11:40pm I pick up laptop for first time all day and start looking at blogs etc. I'm on DD duty tonight for hub.
12:50am Finalize blog post and plan to head into bed.....after I check on just a few more things..... ;)
Expect phone call to pick up hub & maybe his friend before 3am.....

What a Year it Was--2011

Honestly I hadn't thought much at all about the year that had passed as we rang in the new one. For some reason, I think I've been anxiously awaiting 2012--even though the year has some apprehension for me too (those zombies!).  However today as I started my work-out in the garage with flakes of snow slowly falling from the sky outside the window, I started thinking about everything that passed during the last year:

MOVING
March saw us crossing five states as we made our exodus from Louisiana back to Oregon with a 26 ft moving truck, our two vehicles, two cats, and two dogs. We came back to friends and reaquainted with family. We soaked up the beauty and "green-ness" of Oregon. We bought good beer, good wine, and good food. We visited the coast and mountains. We recycled more, enrolled in green energy, built raised beds, planted & harvested fruits & veggies, made soups & salsa, and got chickens. We spent our first married holiday with our families. We got used to no sales tax and good coffee, but we miss sweet tea, good running trails, friends, and pumping our own gas.

MEMORABLE CELEBRATIONS
July brought with it another "nephew"--the first child of one of my best gals and what an incredible bundle of love he's turned out to be.
August saw Granny celebrating her 100th birthday--something I had given up hope of arriving when she'd broken her first leg visiting us in Louisiana the summer before. While her mind is not as agile as before, the woman never ceases to astound me!
August also brought a renewing visit from my eldest brother for Granny's celebrations and an absolutely perfect day float trip down the river with extended family and a few friends.
Bridesmaid duties intersected a portion of the year---supporting my gal N, selecting dresses, (attempting) throwing a bridal shower with her family, and in the fall being a part of the special day!
A first Christmas split between our various families & friends---a crazy holiday party, trips to see holiday lights near and far, Central Oregon visits, and relaxing moments with the parents.

VISITS FROM FRIENDS
New Years 2011 we celebrated with four of our favorites in New Orleans. A memorable trip it was with spooky stories, Burboun St, live jazz, and delicious eats.

This summer we entertained friends from Chicago for a week--showing them Portland, river floating, and a trip to the coast.

The holiday season brought back to Oregon some of my nearest and dearest from places like Georgia, Canada, Arizona, and California. We made new memories and shared old ones.

And we spent many memorable moments catching up and visiting with friends here in Oregon on the coast, in the city, and in the mountains too. And then there was the start of book club...and there's no need to explain more on the awesomeness of what the provides to my life.

GOALS ACHIEVED
Hub started toward obtainment of his bachelor degree and earned his first 4.0. We made small strides toward increased sustainable living with canning, raised beds, & chickens. We spent more moments with family and friends, including hosting in our rental home. We've painted walls, ripped out plants, and composted. We've made it over half-way thru paying off his truck and my student loan finally dipped into a lower ten thousand category. We attempted the Clean diet, lodged hundreds of miles by foot, and started P90X. We bought a new bed, used wedding ring, and a longer-term vehicle. We donated more and increased our saving.

NEW JOBS & ROLES
The move saw both of us leaving positions we were good at for uncertainities of what lay ahead. Hub got into his school of choice, but decided on the easier commute. He left his role of soldier for that of student with a bit of relaxation and unemployment inbetween. I left a job I loved to move right into a new position which utilizes my degrees. I've gotten into a great department, trained on some new skills, and started into another position that brings both fulfillment and frustration in one.

OUTDOOR PURSUITS
We hiked up heights and along trails, we camped, we floated rivers and walked along beaches, and we learned to run together. Hub took his bud on a 50+ mile hike down the coast, completed the 30 mile trail in Forest Park, and hiked alone around the Sisters Mtns in central Oregon. We took my cousin and her boyfriend camping. Together we went on my first backpacking trip, explored new areas of central Oregon by foot and truck, summitted our first (mini-) peak, and re-set my personal record for distance on a run before we left Louisiana.

LIFE LESSONS
This year brought a lot of moments of questions and lessons. In leaving and returning, we learned who our truest friends are and had to ask ourselves big questions about our desired roles in our families. We contemplated a separation this summer but in the end kept true to our commitment. We talked briefly about future life goals, desires, and plans....and spent moments relishing in the beauty that we currently had. We learned that expectations rarely are true to life, but in other moments life provides more than one could have ever expected. And we learned to continue to be open to what life has to offer.....and with that I'll leave you with a great quote from Pinterest:

Image from here.

And many other moments left unmentioned. A full year it was and I imagine that 2012 will be much of the same!