It's Not About Me

So today for the second time in the last few weeks, I found myself annoyed with.....me. Because you see, lately (ahem maybe the last year...two years.....) it feels like this life is all about....me. So many sentences start with I, so many sentences focus on I, so many thoughts start and focus on I.....and really it's pretty tiring all this I, I, I all the time. Because truthfully, this life, well it's not about me. In the big scheme of things, my life is one little dot on the map and really there's not much missing from this life. Some of those big thoughts I mentioned in a previous post pertained to the disconnect that exists at times between our expectations of life and what the reality of our moments really can be at times. Its so easy to become upset with everything we DO have because it doesn't always compare to what we thought we might be getting.  Well, I hate to break it to myself, but there's not much for this gal to be complaining about.....

SO much gets taken for granted or still desired, when there are many others who could benefit from simple generosity. Part of the reason for my initial attraction to a life of simplicity was due to the lack of acquisition and due to the old standby statement of "living simply so that others may simply live." Rather than wasting money and resources, life took on a new meaning of being purposeful and mindful about purchases and how to greater bless the lives of others. While part of that mentality still exists, much has been lost in the last several months/couple years. While personal life has headed in lots of new directions, there still is ample room for generosity and mindfulness to prevail and for less of a focus on myself.

In thinking about how my selfish nature has evolved, somehow this song continues to enter my mind. The reality is the most settled life has ever been is when I felt most aligned with walking in the faith of Christian values which are pretty similar to those of living a life of simplicity. When my thoughts and focus goes back to the "heart of the matter" then its truly not about me anymore, but rather how I can be a vessel to demonstrate love, generosity, and companionship to others. When the "heart of the matter" is ever present, a life of stewardship and mindfulness come much more easily. So while it probably won't be easy, I'm working toward reconnection with that old matter of the heart and with being a better global citizen, giver, and protector.

My heart and soul breaks for the suffering the world over and while it might be overwhelming at times, the best way to make an impact on that suffering is to do something, anything....rather than to hide in the shadows pretending that the world is peachy keen. To help out where one can and in whatever way one can.....this is something I need to get back to....giving my money, giving my time, giving my prayers, and giving my heart.

This blog wasn't necessarily supposed to be a diary of me either.....that doesn't mean that you aren't going to continue to learn way too much personal info than I ever intended to broadcast across the web, but it does mean that maybe, just maybe there will finally be some educational posts---sharing that wealth of education and knowledge gleaned throughout my public health, social work, and education programs. Wouldn't that be food for thought?!

So on that note, I'm going to redirect you to an old post I wrote about a wonderful charitable organization back home. This organization continues to touch my heart and soul as they provide such a worthy service to many individuals that are frequently bypassed and overlooked on the streets. They haven't given up hope on the fabulous individuals they are serving although their funding is seriously touch and go almost every month, and they haven't given up on me for being a touch and go donor either (nor do they harass the mailbox either). Adding to the goals on the sidebar will be one pertaining to donating in some form each and every month to a charitable organization.

Please bear with me and show patience as I continue to learn that it's NOT all about me......and please feel free to remind me when I get too far out of alignment. Here's to getting back to the heart of the matter......