Whew!--Authentic & Changed

The week went by in a whirlwind of the new routine!  Luckily yesterday was a restful day especially since today included a spontaneous trip to look for a new sectional.  It's now 10pm on Sunday evening, my bed is calling my name, and I'm finally trying to post and catch up on everyone's blogs from the previous week.  But to be honest, at this point, I still wouldn't have it any other way.  I got asked to cover this coming week at work also, and I'm looking forward to the extra time, training, and money.  While it's still not official, there may just be a silver lining of the unemployment cloud headed this way....

However yesterday I had some thoughts....about the concept of getting caught up in the working cycle as a means to pay off that which you don't actually get to enjoy all that much in your own home.  As the husband and I talk about purchasing an additional couch/sectional, a larger more comfortable bed (my husband is tall and I admit I completely like to take up my side of the bed), and a replacement TV for the broken one in our garage....I began to think about how much time I've actually been able to spend enjoying the couch we do have during these last couple of weeks.  Thus I stationed my rear on the couch for most of Saturday and the husband and I indulged ourselves with some really well done instant Netflix documentaries (The Garden; Dear Zachary--check them out!).  While I'm unsure about the timing of these purchases I do have to offer the other side: we're being intelligent about current sale prices, delivery options (which necessitates pick up in Houston), and investing in pieces that will fit our lifestyle for years to come.  Basically we are looking to create a comfortable, functional, inviting home...and we're headed toward a financial situation to make some of the purchases we've been waiting on.  Although the very, very guilty frugal side of me has her own hesitations.  Yet, I also have realized that currently I'm working because I WANT to be working, to be utilizing my brain and skills to help other people in a meaningful way, and so I'm not working unhappily as a means to buy us things.  (Although the potential paychecks will be fabulous for getting us out of debt and prepped for the changes that will occur in the next year.....all of which is still possible with the said purchases.) 

All these thoughts though lead me back to the point of this blog.  As you all know, for months I've been debating where this blog is headed.  The one thing that I keep coming back to is the title that I selected when I started writing: Simply Authentic.  Thus I really feel that this blog's purpose is for me to be truthful and authentic about where I/we currently am/are on this journey of simplicity.  I will readily admit that marriage has altered who I am, my current location has altered the options available for some of my enviro-simple inclinations, and having to consider a second individual's desires has also led to compromise on some things.....thus the person who I am now and how I am living is a very different reality from my existence when I first started this blog.  Although none of my passions have changed, I also feel that I've entered a period of just not knowing how to move forward to put my passions into daily practice.  I feel in some ways that this move and adjustment to marrying someone with a slightly different mentality has made me face how  many of the other side think and exist.  It's definitely a far cry from the sustainability bubble and social justice focused circle I had surrounding me during the last several years....and it's been a challenge.  Thus as mentioned in previous posts, the most authentic thing I can say is that I'm still trying to figure out just how to approach some of these things.....while still being, well ME.

But the nice thing about the support of the blog world is that you realize that simplicty is so many things to so many people.  Rhonda over at Down to Earth consistently advises that you must tailor simplicity to where you currently are in your life....and so that is how I'm trying to proceed forward.  So you probably will notice some postings here that contradict previous postings or confessions of "regressions" back to the "mainstream," but I think the thing that makes me feel secure about continuing is recognizing that I truly can only post about where and who I am now.  And the best way to proceed forward is to be authentic about it all....after all simplicity is sort of like the ocean that I love so dear...sometimes its an ebb and flow process.

So all THAT being said, here is a listing of some of the changes that have occurred...just to clear some of the air ;)

Confessions:
--We get plastic bags often at the store and use them to pick up the feces of our pets.  I know this is environmentally unfriendly...however paper bags are not an option due to maggot issues in the trash can. 
--I no longer clean with baking soda and vinegar....instead I've sold out to Clorox Green Works and to be honest I'm not even entirely sure why....and for those horrible green water stains we have here I've also had to resort to tougher chemical cleaners...
--We also use paper towels frequently, mainly to wipe up Roxi's pees (we're having house training issues alot lately); although we do use old bath towels too and to wipe their feet when they come inside.
--I can't kick my long shower habit.  They've gotten shorter since marrying but some days nothing soothes my soul like a good long shower.
--I didn't want to pay shipping ordering my veggie mascara from back home so I just bought the cheap, unhealthy drug store kind.
--I finally broke down and threw out 2 pairs of those old, smelly ballet slippers I've had for years...and felt incredibly guilty in the process.
--Since there aren't a lot of good used business clothes options around here, I invested in a bunch of new work clothes for this new job. 
--I threw a soup can in the trash at work because they don't recycle there (although this is something I'm going to work on if I do get hired on there....).
--I hardly even worry about organic or local produce, since there isn't any available around here right now and the dogs & winter rains demolished everything we'd planted.....
--I've been drinking cheap coffee bought in bulk rather than the kind that helps save people and the planet.

And I'm sure there are many other slights I could list.  Yet in producing this list I did have to remind myself that at least I'm cognizant of the fact that these are slights to the health and vitality of ourselves and planet, whereas many others wouldn't even question these behaviors/choices.  And I also reminded myself of many of the positive things that we really are doing for ourselves from a financial, health, environmental, and simplistic standpoint...so maybe even though I've changed...I'm still hopeful we're not doing too bad.

As always, here's to you and yours----head up, heart strong, and renewed.....