Where Have I Been?

Once again my sister has been keeping tabs on me.....;-)

So what has happened to me? I've been making choices-good and bad. I've been busy, I've been still. I've been loud and I've been quiet. But really I've just been trying to get by, stay afloat, look ahead-and I'm not sure that's the best way to live. Believe me, I'm still enjoying the little moments such as walking up to the park at the top of the street overlooking the city and being in awe of the color in the clouds. Or sitting in the highest floor on campus and looking out at the green rooftops and seagulls perched on ledges of buildings-just in reflection. Or taking a motorcycle ride up to a farming island in the middle of the river to watch the recent lunar eclipse.

I've walked around town in awe of this life that I live and wondered how I've gotten here. I've noticed the trees, watched the people, and felt the sun shining down in this period of great weather before the spring rains arrive. I've been pushed in my independence and realized that I can do more than I really believed that I could alone. I've had to swallow my pride. I've had to be honest with myself.

I've moved within my apartment. I wake up now on the top floor in the farthest corner of the building, listening to the birds singing their happy song. I watch the squirrels scurrying about on the patio below, I marvel at the buds on the trees and await when they will blossom, I feel gratitude at being able to see the sky from my windows. I am planning for when I can plant window boxes with green beans, tomatoes, peppers, and the like. I'm feeling comfortable in my space and understanding that God can be so good.

I've had to realize that some of the people that I never expected to be there for me will be there, some that I thought would be there won't be as available, and some that I expected to be there always will be. I've met new people-one of which is just heading into a life of simple living and its been nice to have someone with similar interests around to make me reflect back upon myself. And I've had others that have pointed out the ever presented contradictions that exist within my life.

I've prayed, I've cried, I've laughed, I've danced. I've lived fully...and I'm kind of tired. I've had midterms and have one month more til spring break in which I hope to go rejuvenate on the coast. Feed my soul in only the way that the ocean breeze can do. And I'm hoping that this next term will bring some release and good news as well. At the least, it will bring baseball season along with it. :-)

My thoughts have been sparse this month because I'm not feeling able to explore the topics that I'd really care to divulge in. I'm not feeling like I'm really thinking about the things that resonate strongest with my soul. I'm still living as green a life as I ever was and while it's been authentic, I don't know that it's been simple. But I'm content in the knowledge that it will get back there...it always does. Anything does when you believe in it.

And I hope that all of you are feeling content and full of belief in your own lives. May you enjoy the rest of this gorgeous weekend!